Poor Poor Pitiful Me

Former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales had lunch with the Wall Street Journal recently and raised a couple of questions that have been nagging him. Well, questions are what we do around here, kids, so we're pleased to help out:

"What is it that I did that is so fundamentally wrong, that deserves this kind of response to my service?" he said during an interview Tuesday, offering his most extensive comments since leaving government.

Well, for starters, Al, let's go back to this handy chart. Your name's in the center, having had your fingers into the authorizing of:

• Warrantless wiretapping
• Coercive interrogation (we prefer the less polite term "torture")
• The CIA's destruction of tapes of "coercive interrogations"
• Hiring political hacks to fill the ranks at the DoJ
• Firing U.S. Attorneys who were insufficiently political
  

That was easy, wasn't it? (Here's a friendly tip regarding #2: Stay in the U.S.. For the rest of your life.) The next one's even easier.

During a lunch meeting two blocks from the White House, where he served under his longtime friend, President George W. Bush, Mr. Gonzales said that "for some reason, I am portrayed as the one who is evil in formulating policies that people disagree with. I consider myself a casualty, one of the many casualties of the war on terror."

You poor baby.

Alberto, this goes beyond disagreement. When you're formulating policies that are evil, such as torture, you get portrayed as evil. Comes with the territory.

Oh yeah, we had a question our own selves. Mr. Gonzales also mentioned that he's writing a book about his time in office, which brings us to This Week's Discussion Question:

How can someone who, while under oath, couldn't remember a damned thing, write a freaking memoir?

Please keep the discussion civil and feel free to wander off into suggesting a title for former AG AG's misty water-colored memories.

Discuss.