After the Rain

From the futon in the TWDQ library, let's try some liveblogging! The bottom of the 7th is starting, so here we go!

8:06: Hey! No "God Bless America"! Woody Guthrie would be proud.

8:08: Note to Bud: It's one thing when the bench guys are wearing stocking caps, but when the ballplayers on the field are wearing caps with Elmer Fudd flaps, you might think about pulling the season in a week or two.

8:18: The "Rocky" theme again? Please...

8:23: Hey! Does anyone know if Jim Carrey's got a new movie coming out?

8:33: Jayson Werth, at 2 for 2, hasn't had "a good night", Joe. It's been "a good game" or a "a couple of good nights".

8:34: William Penn was cursing the Phils? Huh?

8:37: Any pitcher could throw a hanging breaking ball. Man, the things you can learn from Tim McCarver...

8:41: What the hell is up with the twin bathtubs in Cialis commercials? "A jug of wine, a loaf of bread, a pair a of bathtubs facing the beach, and thou..."

8:44: Around the horn! Let's show each fielder briefly! Why?

8:45: Joe Buck reads the media guide's history page. Wow.

8:46: Lidge's slider is so good it occasionally gets past the catcher? Hell, I have a slider that can do THAT...

8:49: Could we get a tighter shot of Lidge? I can still see the top and bottom of his head...

8:52: Once again, DirtCam sheds no light on a play...

8:53: Take that, William Penn! Congrats, Phils!

8:57: Well, we're going to go find us a drinkable beer (as opposed to one with "drinkability").

Hey, let's wrap this with a special Celebratory Man Love Edition of This Week's Discussion Question:

When has beer ever been hard to drink?

Please keep the discussion civil and feel free to wander off into "When's spring training?"

Discuss.

Change We Can Believe In

We interrupt This Week's Discussion Question to bring you some great news.

The airtime that Barack Obama has purchased tonight on Fox and several other networks will not delay the start of the resumption of the suspended Game 5 of the 2008 World Series.

It will, however, result in Fox cutting back on the pre-game show, so there will be less Joe Buck and Tim McCarver tonight.

That, my friends, is Change We Can Believe In.

We now return you to This Week's Discussion Question, already in progress.

New Adventures in Stupid

Just when you thought we'd hit rock bottom, they get out the dynamite and blast down to a whole new level:

Conservative media figures allege Obama's Hawaii trip is about discredited birth-certificate rumors, not his ailing grandmother

Okay, Rush, you got us. The Hawaii thing's a ruse. He really IS from Krypton.

Oy.

Idiot Wind

Another benefit of the recent TWDQ HQ move was that we are no longer in this crazy person's Congressional district. (Our new Congressional representative is a *gasp*...Muslim!)

On the downside, we're not there to provide a few additional votes to help our former pastor show her the door. (Speaking of which, the blogosphere is an amazing thing, isn't it?)

Rest easy, Congresswoman. The two most dangerous anti-Americans in our government will be out of jobs three months from tomorrow. If that's not soon enough for you, Michele, you could start this ball rolling. Better late than never, we say.

We concur with tbogg, who recently wrote, "Seriously, and to paraphrase Paul Begala, if stupid ever goes to $40 a barrel, I want the drilling rights to Michelle Bachmann's head."

And, as the honorable Rufus T. Firefly remarked, "Gentlemen, Chicolini here may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot."

Of course, when we mentioned "Did you hear what Crazy Michele said yesterday?" the college student, here on fall break, inquired, "Which Crazy Michelle?"

We now return you to This Week's Discussion Question, already in progress.

Hanging on the Telephone

Bought a new over-the-range microwave oven for TWDQ HQ's kitchen and ran into an installation snag last night. Called the retailer's 1-800 number on the sheet of paper taped to the front of the unit in case you encounter problems with the appliance, but none of the three very pleasant people we were routed through--after an automated voice routed us--could hook us up with anyone technical enough to answer our not all that technical question.

Decided to call the store where we made the purchase. We repeat, the number for the local store. The conversation went something like this:

Voice Recognition Software Receptionist: "Thank you for calling (rhymes with 'beers')! Say the name of the department you're looking for or say 'department list' for a list of departments at this loca..."

TWDQ: "Appliances."

VRSR: "You said 'appliances'. Is that correct?

TWDQ: "Yes."

VRSR: "Good! If you're calling about a large appliance, like a refrigerator or a washing machine, say 'large appliance'. If you're calling about a small appliance, like a mixer or microwave, say 'small appliance'.

TWDQ: "Small appliance."

VRSR: "You said 'small appliance'. Just a moment, I'll transfer you.

Real Person at Local Store: "(Rhymes with 'beers'), how may I help you?"

TWDQ: "Is this Appliances?"

RPaLS: "Just a minute, I'll transfer you."

Real Person Selling Appliances: "Appliances. How may I help you?"

And here we are at This Week's Discussion Question:

What the hell good was that automated stuff?

Please keep the discussion civil and do not wander off into "Por Espanol..." or "Is this big or small appliances?"

Discuss.

Smart Girls (and Boys)

All in all, it was a pretty good Monday, and we're not even talking about Wall Street's rally or the Rays hammering the Red Sox.

It was a Monday bookended by hope. It began with news of Paul Krugman winning a Nobel Prize, wrapped up with Rachel Maddow schooling David "Axis of Evil" Frum (Note to Dave: It's not very bright to throw your first pitch behind the head of someone who can and will take you deep) and raises This Week's Discussion Question:

Is "smart" the new black?

Please keep the discussion civil and do not wander off into "Paul Wolfowitz? Really, Dave? The only guy who's been more wrong more often is Bill Kristol" or "Wow. Isn't there a ten-run rule for interviews?"

Discuss.

Who Woulda Thunk It?

Flipped over to CNN this afternoon after Tampa beat the Whiteys and reporter Dana Bash, outside the Washington University auditorium where tonight's Biden-Palin debate will take place, said that the atmosphere felt more like a prize fight, prompting this special visual version of This Week's Discussion Question:

A prize fight? Gosh, what would give anyone that idea?

Please keep the discussion civil and feel free to wander off into making up your own joke about using a "rope-a-dope" strategy.

Discuss.